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“Men Don’t Cry”

If you’re a guy reading this right now, you’re probably smiling and thinking “Yes! Finally, the most common phrase I’ve heard my entire life is here”.

Ever wondered why?

Why this society wants you to “man up” whenever you cry?

Why is this society always comparing you to girls when you shed a drop of tear?

Why this society wants you to take up the responsibilities of your family and gulp down all the pain that you might have ever had?

It is said that being a woman is difficult but have you ever asked the men of our society how they are struggling in a world where they are taught to be “macho man”, be disciplined, and of course NOT TO CRY, because emotions are just another cover up for weakness.

Our society has always portrayed men as a stronger gender - one who is emotionally, physically stronger, and doesn’t cry like girls. This myth not only makes men weaker but also pressurizes them to succumb to live up to the ideals of society.

Just like oxygen is important to us to survive, a good mental health is also important to us. But there are many reasons why men are less likely to speak up about mental health problems like depression.

Yes! Men also suffer from Depression, Anxiety, Schizophrenia and Eating Disorder. You might know many men who are facing mental health issues but what does our society usually do. We bombard them with our questioning and judgements.

“Stop crying like girl”

“Men don’t have emotional problems.”

“Therapy isn’t for men.”

“Real men don’t ask for help.”

Men are constantly under pressure to appear strong and stoic, no matter how badly they’re hurting. The fear of being labelled as “weak” or “damaged” keeps many from letting loved ones know that they need help. You may find men hesitant to disclose about their emotional turmoil or denying that their main problem is psychological.

They even fear of being judged by the society that they refuse to go to the pharmacy and pick up an anti-depressant for themselves. They don’t want to visit a therapist because they don’t want to share things with a stranger. Because of these fear that they have which is created by us and the society, their concerns often go unnoticed.

(know your meme)

Men don’t always show the signs we typically associate with depression, like sadness and hopelessness. Instead, they might appear angry or aggressive, making it easier for doctors and loved ones to miss the signs that something is wrong. Usually, men try to hide their depression with alcohol. Binge-drinking, smoking and other coping mechanisms have become a daily lifestyle for them.

According to the National Mental Health Survey 2015-16, the prevalence of alcohol use disorders in males was 9% as against 0.5% in females. And the overall prevalence of mental morbidity was higher among men (13.9%) than among women (7.5%). As a result, men might miss out on the treatment they need to feel better.

Although the stigma surrounding mental illness affects everyone, mental health is often viewed as a “women’s issue” and is more often depicted in popular media as something that women struggle with.

Even a man has the heart of a child. It’s always tough on the outside, but one should see a child inside too. So let us free men from the burden of toxic masculinity. Let men have the freedom to recognize and seek professional support if they are suffering from symptoms of mental health issues or if they know someone who is. Let’s not have those judgmental eyes when they hug their mother for comfort. Let’s ask them “How are you feeling today”.

And lastly let’s not use the common phrase that they are tired of hearing:

“Men Don’t Cry”

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